


Dream On

by lovemelizards (tomfics)



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Dark Past, Future, M/M, Post-Canon Cardassia, Self-Reflection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-11 22:54:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28875282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tomfics/pseuds/lovemelizards
Summary: The midmorning sun slivers between the soft cotton white curtains, laying playful shadows and light on Garak’s dormant figure, warming up the room into a delicious temperature for the Cardassian. He arouses, arm automatically reaching out to the other side of the bed and finding nothing. He opens his eyes a bit, sighing softly to himself. He missed him, he missed the warm pliable body that laid beside him, the soft skin to hold and cherish. He pulls the covers away and resigns himself to getting up and facing a new day.
Relationships: Julian Bashir/Elim Garak
Comments: 15
Kudos: 44
Collections: Star Trek: Just in Time Fest





	Dream On

The midmorning sun peeks through the soft cotton white curtains, laying playful shadows on Garak’s dormant figure, warming up the room into a delicious temperature for the Cardassian. He arouses, arm automatically reaching out to the other side of the bed and finding nothing. He opens his eyes a bit, sighing softly to himself. He missed him, he missed the warm pliable body that laid beside him, to hold and cherish. He pulls the covers away and resigns himself to getting up and facing a new day. 

Clad in just pyjama bottoms, he grabs a tunic and pants and almost on autopilot goes about his routine, entering the shower, turning the heat high and letting the warmth envelop and relax his muscles. When he is done, he turns the water off, wraps himself in a fluffy towel and stands in front of the mirror with a comb to brush and sleek down his hair. When he looks up, he comb falls into the sink with a clink, forgotten as he stares at the mirror, his image staring back.

Sometimes he wondered where had time gone by? When had his appearance changed so dramatically?

Caught off-guard, he allows his mind to open the door of his compartmentalized memories. He closes his eyes tightly as images of the past and present flash rapidly under his eyelids, flooding him with ghostly memories of touch, sight and scent. Timelines scramble and intermingle, fighting for attention. With a shuddering breath he faces his reflection again, where the only constant variant all this time are his bright blue eyes. The memory of his young self slowly morphs into his reality. His eyes absorb the softness of his facial contours, the greying of his hair, lines on his face becoming clearer. It is like he is there, in the past, but here, at the same time.

Son of Tain. Tailor. Obsidian Order agent. Friend. Collaborator. Interrogator. Husband. Exile. Leader.

It didn’t matter which persona, which time, he was, is, Elim Garak. Everything he has done, everything he will do. They all form part of the fabric that is uniquely him. And although he isn’t without regrets, he wouldn’t change one thing if it meant changing what he was now and what he had now.

Even though his body was softer, he was still strong. Even though his knees cracked, he was still agile. Even though age was catching up with him, he was still loved.

He existed both there and here.

But, oh, how he loved _here_. The sins that tainted his body and mind slowly faded away as his life, his body and his mind changed. The good deeds like water washing away the blood from his hands.

He had sacrificed and lost so much in the past, but those losses, that pain, had made him value what he had won. All the effort, tears, anger, emptiness. All worth it for the _now_. He had gained a precious prize he would never let go of, clinging to it until his last breath left his body. A prize he cherished, a prize he often wondered if he deserved. _Happiness_.

He took a deep breath and when his sight focused again in the mirror, he found familiar hazel eyes looking back at him even with the soft crinkles that adorned around them now. A warm and fond smile reserved just for him. He smiled back. Julian. _His_ Julian.

Julian wraps his arms around Garak's waist. Grounding the Cardassian definitively back into the present, into this moment, where he was a man prosperous with love, happiness and accomplishments. Julian kisses one of his bare shoulders.

“Breakfast is ready my love, come. It’ll get cold.”

“I’ll be right there.” Garak replies, turning to give his husband a soft kiss.

Julian leaves the bathroom, and the air is cold now in his absence, chilly against his bare skin. He pulls on a tunic and pants. Humming to himself, he knows today will be a good day, because sharing his life with Julian meant that every day was a good day.

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by Dream On by Aersomith 
> 
> [lovemelizards on Tumblr](https://lovemelizards.tumblr.com/).
> 
> This was absolutely experimental, be kind <3


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